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Success is liking yourself, liking what you do, and liking how you do it. – Maya Angelou

These past few months have been an absolute blur.

We’re over halfway into 2019 and I feel like I’ve not done much but at the same time I also feel like I’ve gotten more done or under my belt that I maybe just didn’t think was going to be put on my plate.

From partnership officially happening just over four months ago (and folks are renewing for a fifth month already!!) to the insanely wild ride it’s been since then – PAX East came and went (streamed live from there, with my best friend, btw!), new games played, friendships strengthened, I’ve had some crazy opportunities with more to come, and we’re nearly five thousand followers strong right now – I’ve honestly been overwhelmed with a lot of I need tos and I really should have already dones. It’s a lot to deal with, feeling like I’m letting people down at every turn by not doing all the things simultaneously and successfully.

While I’m trying not to let the guilt of still not having finished projects I wanted to have done back in March, I’m also allowing myself to have fun and continue onward without feeling too badly it’s taken me longer to get progress done. I have to remember my friends and those who truly support me will forgive my ineptitude and slowness to keep to a schedule or half-baked ideas. I am more steadily getting and manifesting my creativity, trying my best to nurture without forcing it to come faster or on an unrealistic schedule. I’ve got some painting/creating ideas bouncing around, just need to tame and work them onto canvas. I’m excited and willing to continue working, and that’s the most important part!

I haven’t made progress on a podcast, but that’s alright – the market is pretty saturated right now, and I’d first like to have everyone get the idea out of their systems before trying in earnest. I’d also like to have a few ideas fully fleshed out in different ways to really figure out a better approach, style and feel for what I want to accomplish.

Instead of having all my entries be perfectly crafted, inspirational posts chock full of imagery, metaphors and other such flowery language, I’m allowing myself to write a little more relaxed and informal. Sometimes I need to write when it’s messy and scattered and rough and not so pretty. It’s for me just as much as it is for you reading this. Hopefully in doing this, I’ll be more prone to updating, like how I used to back in those xanga/livejournal/blogspot days. Ah, to be an impressionable college student again…

-RLB

ps – #beMORE💜 is still going strong! I don’t succeed every day, but far more successes than failures overall, for sure.